I am struggling with something. Actually, I’ve been trying to figure this out for about 40 years.
I wonder if anyone out there can give me a biblical or spiritually sound opinion on the following problem:
Rest assured. I am not feeling sorry for myself. There is something I am supposed to be learning right now and I am seeking the advice of my peers, the wisest people I know.
I have had my heart broken many times. Not just by lovers, but by family, and very close friends. Many, many, many times.
I was born with a kind, sensitive, open heart. But along the way, I lost that ability. I put up walls of protection, and after a while I even lost the capacity for love.
Since my fairly recent, spiritual awakening, I have been given a new heart. I know that I am loved and that softens my heart and opens me up to connect with everyone around me.
Although I love this miraculous rebirth of my old self, there is a problem.
I have recently learned the hard way, that having an open heart makes me vulnerable to the cruelty of insensitive people. People I care about can hurt me so easily. A voice in my head says, “That’s been your problem all along. Those heartbreaks were a major factor in your spiral toward rock-bottom.”
There’s a verse in the bible that says to “guard your heart.” Does that mean that I should be closed off?
Is there a Godly way to love people and protect myself at the same time?
I want to love people the way God loves them. I really do. I love feeling connected to everyone with a divine invisible thread.
I just don’t know if I can, or should just walk around open and vulnerable to every possible heartache…?
I’m sure I will eventually work this out, but what is our little community for if not to offer support and advice to one another?
I am looking for real wisdom here, not platitudes.
I love you all so much!