This is for the one who has dreary days and painful nights. I know you are out there.
This is the most important thing I will write. My pain has become my story. It’s purpose is to help you.
I will be posting this to all my groups and pages. To some it will seem rude or overbearing to do so, but I don’t care. Finding you is my sole purpose.
This is for you. I know you. I was you.
I know the day you’re having. It looks very much like all your days. The sun has refused to shine. Life is hard work. You are busy doing things you despise. The cheerful cashier is painfully annoying. You don’t believe happiness is real. Maybe today, you will decide to get through this day.
I know the week you’re having. The work of your hands is a distraction from the sadness and stress, yet you watch the clock and wait for the weekend or the next thing or the end. When you are not mired in some pointless chore, you search for any distraction. You escape into a screen, a bottle, a habit, or a credit card. Time has no meaning. Life just drags along. Every day is heaviness.
I know the month you’re having. The bills must somehow be paid, again. The passing thought of responsibilities and deadlines is overwhelming. You do what you must to get by, but you are definitely not on top of things. Sadness and fear invade every cycle, every dream. Pay the bills. Be responsible. Anxiety. Do what’s right. Do better. Guilt. Food has lost it’s flavor. Why do others have it so easy? Depression. It’s overwhelming. It’s too much. It’s always too much.
I know the year you’re having. The passing seasons go unnoticed. Another birthday. Who cares? Still alive, for no reason. No purpose to anything. There is just fear and sadness.
I know the life you’re having. Crisis is all you know. Your heart only beats with the race of panic. Your body feels heavy and slow. Depression weighs you down like a lead shroud. Peace is a foreign language. You are deaf and blind.
I was you.
This is the place in the writing that scares me. You need this so badly. I know there is a beautiful, perfect way out for you. I pray I can find the right words to make you believe it.
When I was there, in that dark place, I tried lots of things. I read a ton of books. I learned to meditate. I kept a journal. I figured things out.
Through my searching, I discovered two things that I absolutely believe.
1. You must make a decision that you want to get better. Decide to be healed. Do anything and everything that will bring some light into your world. Sit down and think. Recall the things that have brought you joy in the past, and find a way to make it happen again. Every single day, make an effort to do some little thing that will give you hope. There may be a million things wrong, but if you can make a small shift away from the darkness, even for a few minutes each day, it will make a huge difference. Joy will grow on it’s own and multiply itself when it is nurtured.
2. You have everything you need, already inside you to be happy. I know this sounds like a cliché, but please let these words sink in, in a real and solid way. You were created from love. There is an energy that is in every cell of your body and mind that has the power to heal you. Powerful forces like peace, joy, gratitude, abundance, forgiveness, and generosity are lying dormant in your being. Everything you need is there, waiting to be stirred. You don’t need to know how to find them in this moment. All you need is the unwavering belief that they exist. Faith will do the work for you.
Please, please don’t give up. You are the leading character in an amazing story. This can be your turning point. This can be the day when the light starts to show up. Your resurrection story may be the thing that will save someone else.
I send you love from my whole heart.